Slavi's Joke: Offer

Society | June 13, 2003, Friday // 00:00

A Bulgarian guy went to visit a friend who lived next door and soon the two found themselves sitting drink in hand and politics as the main topic of the conversation. As one drink followed another, the subject of their conversation gradually evolved to... sex.

And this was when the guest, having a moment of revelation, said: "Dear neighbor, I have a confession to make. For two year I have been secretly watching your wife - I like her very much. I will give 50 levs to put a finger on her naked body."

"What finger on naked body," the host shouted and two slaps drowned the final words of his phrase.

But as it is always the case with such drunken quarrels between close friends, in only five seconds the guest crawled from under the table, recovered himself and went on with his offer.

"My fried, there must be a misunderstanding. I will give 50 levs to touch your wife's naked body just once. You will be present. I won't do anything else - it is just one touch!"

Then the guest left and the host, in order to test his wife's faithfulness, went to her and related the whole offer.

The woman gave the proposal some thought and said: "Darling, I know how you feel, I know what you will be going through when you watch how he touches me but I have to ask you some questions. Does your child need new sneakers? Yes, he does. Does your child need new jeans? Yes, he does. When was the last time you saw a banknote of 50 levs? If he is to touch me just once, then tell him I'm ready!"

On the other day, the husband went to the neighbour and with a heart full of sorrow and said: "My friend, in connection to your request, I had a little talk with my wife and she is ready. You may come to my place tonight!"

So the appointed hour arrived - moon in the sky - and the guy put on his best clothes to go to the neighbors.

He sat on the sofa there, the host switched on to an erotic TV channel to get the right atmosphere as the wife appeared in a pink robe. You know, silent waters run deep so this housewife proved such a undiscovered erotic prodigy that could put even Madonna to shame.

The woman stripped the robe alluringly and flashed there naked head to toes. Then she started dancing with such passion that her performance made the actor from the erotic movie playing on the TV stop his activity to stare at her.

So she danced for one, two, three, four minutes... The guest kept strict silence, bit his lips and watched. In ten minutes unable to hold himself back, he hit his own knee and cried: "If only I had 50 levs!"

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